ah! rainy flower!!! 

Ah! night...  

ah rain!

identity crisis

that i think my blog is going through - there is enough light fluff stuff and then there are my deep philosophical ponderings, and then out of nowhere i have my turbulent shadow boxing with people of the past - all these don't match - chapters of seperate books, different typefaces, but they are all me,
in fact at the beginning this blog was to be pretty much anonymous, and here i am divulging details of locations, people and stuff like that - in some ways important characters that were needed for the plot, in other ways, maybe people who wouldnt want featured here undisguised- so where do we go now? and my deepest fears - i meet someone who's read my blog and finds out it is me, and the other one - people i have written about actually chance upon the blog.... eeowwww!
actually who reads this blog anyway, dont think i should be so paranoid... maybe i should just change my name.... or maybe it is a pseudonym!! right - there you have it, i am not me, this is someone else!! d- uh!!

another blog hatelist

totally bullshitty blogs these days
full of selling acne cream, cheap laptops, girlie pics or poker casino stuff???
or they are in a strange language - have to go through reams of uselesness before latching onto anything readable... faf!

recommended on so many sites

that i finally watched amelie! really good... but for once i want to see a non love story movie....... hmmmmmmmmmmm, batman, anyone?

in case

you were worrying about me, which in most cases will certainly be not the case, - posts like the last one - are just once in a while eruptions, just my tendency for melodrama, to exhale toxic thoughts etc.. and i am fine

given up on the laptop, settlling for a mp3 phone, and hopefully buying it this week , also buying clothes if i can find the right place to pick up what i can almost imagine but couldnt find...
and found this room in a bungalow with a huge terrace where peacocks visit - and waltz in the rain - reading an average of two books a week and planning three vacations!! and seen three useless movies... and tried to drown in the drizzle yesterday - wow this place really does need rain for the weather to cheer up...

on the downside - unexpected cat visit totally spooked me, and the total absence of sound while reading unnerves me sometimes ( hence the phone) and electric kettle can only give you insta noodles and tea - so i starve often - too lazy to go out alone, too unsociable to ask anyone -

living alone makes you appreciate many a things - instability for instance - ha ha - but i love the fact that rightnow i simply dont have to do anything i dont want to do,

i dont have to be polite, i dont have to be right, i can cook, i can starve, as long as the money trickling in is enough for me to live on, this year i dont care,

any maybe noone else does too

but it is well worth it - this year of wanderings wonderings... bangalore - jaipur - delhi - pune and now ahmedabad next stop kolkata.... whew!!