sometimes

you want to fight the larger being looking after us all somewhere - this is not what the brochure promised - i want a normal family - and then again maybe this much dysfunctionalism is there in every family... i dont want to deal with this - i dont want to run away either, there are no easy answers and everything requires patience and courage and so much amount of love and empathy i feel i am being emptied out when we havent even begun...

and all my silly little problems with mr gone-to-the-us and gosh-i-look-a-sight-in-a swimsuit ind of disappear when i think of my larger picture... or anyones

there is rioting on the street we cause we wont be meritocratic, so we will build a nation of lesser priveliged who will be super priveliged and inefficient,

people are buying and selling and selling and buying because we dont know what we want except we want more money

as if money is not a means to an end but the end itself

but if money can buy you freedom, why not....

hmmm....

now where to? in life, in the country, in to which role - its not so much a matter of deep philosophical wonder, just trying to figure what can i manage right now, a relationship? a trip to bangkok? another workshop? let an old friend seduce me? move out? get a job? do a road trip in europe? join the circus? have a one night stand? start a newspaper? start a virus? meditate? start a religion? buy a new phone? buy a new wardrobe? shoplift it instead? learn cooking? join swimming? learn the flute? go to brazil?

i am serious about the last three... sigh!

Pondicherry!!

all in all fun trip - and in parts, quite charming! actually met interesting people, took interesting walks, shopped smiled, sweated and sulked! besides the actual work and all that technological failure, the trip was GOOD FUN!! andam back all motivated to get more stuff done - lets see where this enthusiasm is going to take me next...

and yes, i may be wrong but universally men seem to be unreliable, attention seeking painful people... just an observation...

Note the wire right through the tongue - entertainment while commuting, gosh what a way to earn a living!!

Using Canon S1IS

the elephant and the mouse? whats with the proportions?!!!

Using Canon S1IS

yet another pottery workshop!!

Using Canon S1IS